LIAR!

Wow. I can't believe how long it's been since I posted. One of my goals when starting this blog was to write at least once a week, and there has been some serious failure on that front. Can I change the past? Not without a flux capacitor, and since I can't seem to find one on sale anywhere (they're fairly expensive), it seems that all I can do is offer an apology. I'm sorry and I will do my best to make sure that there are no further weeks without an update.

As to my weigh ins and what I have been up to, they correlate quite a bit. Let me show you:

6/22/09: 321.0

6/29/09: 323.0

7/6/09: 322.4

Not pretty, I know. Not to use this as an excuse (I've been making excuses about my weight for some time now), but these past few weeks have been an incredible stress roller coaster, one in which you get nauseous on the first turn and throw up, but the ride operator thinks it's funny to keep sending you though over and over again without giving you the chance to get off. Kind of. You see, I've been shopping for a new car. This sounds like a good idea initially. When you first decide to go car shopping, you will think to yourself, "Hey Self! This is going to be so fun, picking a new car! It'll be way easy and people will be nice to you and you can test drive a bunch of different cars to see what you like and the tooth fairy exists and you can even pick whatever color you want!" Do not listen to yourself when you say this because you are a liar. Shopping for a new car will destroy your soul; your very will to live. Everyday I got off work, I would stare at the computer for hours, HOURS, trying to find something that fit what I needed out of my new car. I looked at so many cars that I have the basic Craigslist page outline permanently burned into my retinas. Have you ever stared at a computer screen for so long that you can actually feel your eyes internally bleeding? I now have. On the upside, I think I finally found the car and we are in the process of getting everything signed. It's almost too much to hope for to think that this nightmare will soon be over. If it does all go through, I'll post some pics for you, even though it has nothing to do with weight loss. Try and stop me! You totally can't!

So, to review: Flux Capacitor, vomit, Tooth Fairy, soul stealing, Craigslist, internal bleeding. Did I miss anything?